Kennesaw State University will be introducing a new mascot, a macaque monkey, to honor Punch. A change that will benefit students who are so socially incompetent that they hide their faces behind plush toys.
For those with the misfortune of having a life outside the Internet, Punch was abandoned by his mother. After being introduced to the monkey troop at the Ichikawa City Zoo in Japan, Punch had a hard time making friends and clung to a plush orangutan as a surrogate mother and friend. Now, the small monkey has gained acceptance from his peers.
The new mascot, also named Punch, aims to encourage KSU students to foster stronger friendships. After all, if a monkey can succeed in climbing a social ladder, so can college students living in a time of multiple global crises.
To celebrate the new mascot, the bookstore will begin selling monkey plushes so students can have their own Punch with them when they try to send an email to a professor and feel embarrassed for no reason, or worse yet, make a phone call.
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