Last Week, from Sunday all the way to Saturday, absolutely nothing happened. That’s right, nothing. Birds sang, children played. Men went to work and fucked their wives, and not a single thing happened besides. Everything proceeded as normal. Now, Dear Reader, I hear what you might be saying, “But what about the War in Palestine? What about ICE in Minneapolis? What about-” No, shut up, that didn’t happen. How do I know that didn’t happen? Because when I get up and look outside my window, all I see are the beautiful trees and the clouds trekking across the sky. I don’t see any horrible crimes or widespread abuse of power; I only see peace, and everyone knows things are only real if I can see them.
Now, for the sake of argument, let’s say I do suddenly decide to embrace the delusions of my colleagues. Let’s say I suddenly start believing that it was recently revealed to us that every level of our government has been infiltrated by a cabal of billionaire pedophiles, that our democracy is in real danger of ceasing to exist, and that our national parks are at risk of being destroyed. Well then, quite frankly, I would have no other option except to become a terrorist. I would be forced to reckon with the fact that our society is so fundamentally broken, so venal and corrupt, that it cannot be saved by the light of truth, only the regressive purity of violence.
Luckily for EVERYONE, those things didn’t happen. In fact, nothing happened, not a god damn thing. God is in Heaven, all is right in the world. We are currently existing at the End of History; liberty and justice triumphed in the 90’s. Nothing has happened since, and ever will happen again, and anybody who says otherwise will be responsible for how I respond to that.
