Meet GVSU’s 2026 Honorary Graduate, Trash Panda
Campus celebrity raccoon, Trash Panda, is officially graduating with the Class of 2026 this May, and he’s getting an honorary degree in a new major deemed “Dumpster Economics” with a minor in “Chaos.”
Must Read
“Neon Day” Participant Visible From Space, NASA Issues Statement
NASA was forced to issue an emergency statement Wednesday after detecting what senior scientists had described as “oh no, what the hell is that” glowing from Western Michigan around Grand Rapids.
“Neon Day” Participant Visible From Space, NASA Issues Statement Read More »
New Study Finds That No One Actually Likes Networking Events
In a groundbreaking new study, CU Boulder’s Neuroscience Department discovers that no one actually likes networking. It turns out that everyone is just afraid of being poor. It’s a shared psychosis in mass.
New Study Finds That No One Actually Likes Networking Events Read More »
Copy of Students Prepare for the Upcoming Winter Lady Bug Apocalypse
The Drew administration urges students to contact the Madison authorities should they encounter a horde of lady beetles, so they can send the proper experts to deal with it.
Copy of Students Prepare for the Upcoming Winter Lady Bug Apocalypse Read More »
Class President Endorses a Two Week Old Baby for Senator
This week at Drew, two week old Jonathan is on track to become Drew’s next Senator!
Class President Endorses a Two Week Old Baby for Senator Read More »
GVSU Teachers Replaced by Robots
Robot teachers? GVSU is facing a whole new level of AI in education.
Tired Sophomore in Oversized Shirt and Basketball Shorts Mistaken for Adam Sandler
Students and alumni of Drew University were buzzing with excitement this week as news spread on social media that Adam Sandler was filming a movie with his daughter on campus.
Tired Sophomore in Oversized Shirt and Basketball Shorts Mistaken for Adam Sandler Read More »
Michigan State Graduate From Class of 2013 Starting to Regret Getting Commemorative “MS-13” Neck Tattoo
She asked the artist to give her a tattoo saying “MSU co 2013”. After being told that it would be $20 per letter for the font she chose to shorten it to “MS-13”, thinking everyone would understand what it meant.
Super-super-super-super senior entering his 22nd Semester of undergrad
Kyle Chad III is a super-super-super-super senior starting his 22nd semester of undergrad at MSU. We caught up with Kyle at a bar at 3 pm on a Tuesday afternoon.
Super-super-super-super senior entering his 22nd Semester of undergrad Read More »
Commuter Students Must Now Earn Parking Passes Through Trial by Combat
In a shocking display, Drew has announced a radical overhaul of its parking permit system to replace the current structure after the sale of the commuter lot to Madison. As of now, all commuter students must prove their worthiness to park their vehicle at Drew in a series of high-stakes swordfights.
Commuter Students Must Now Earn Parking Passes Through Trial by Combat Read More »
