Meet GVSU’s 2026 Honorary Graduate, Trash Panda
Campus celebrity raccoon, Trash Panda, is officially graduating with the Class of 2026 this May, and he’s getting an honorary degree in a new major deemed “Dumpster Economics” with a minor in “Chaos.”
Campus
Campus Art Museum to Be Converted Into Parking Lot
Taking inspiration from Timothée Chalamet’s comments on the apparent lack of interest in ballet and opera, Kennesaw State University has decided to tear down the Zuckerman Art Museum to make way for a brand new parking lot.
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Walking Across Campus Now Counts as PE Credit
Starting Fall 2026, all incoming freshmen are required to take DeCardio’s Seminar, an asynchronous one-credit-hour class that satisfies the new PE requirements. To pass the class, students must log their walking habits around campus and complete a minimum of five thousand steps per day.
Opinion: Go Green, White, and… Orange? The Leprechauns on Campus That MSU Doesn’t Want You to Know About.
[All opinions expressed in this article belong to the author, and the author alone.]
There are, without a doubt, Leprechauns at Michigan State University.
What? Don’t you believe me? I can prove it, I swear.
Admin Steals Back Regalia From Recent Graduates to Resell to New Grads
Several recent Bachelors who participated in the last Gradfest have noticed their old caps and gowns going missing, and this pattern has been recognized by our investigation team to be taking place largely around the period of the third and fifth of March.
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Drew Introduces Emotional Support Squirrel Rental
The program, officially titled “Project Rodent,” allows frustrated students to temporarily rent a Drew-trained and certified squirrel for the low price of $49.99 per hour with your dedicated companion.
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New Study Shows That Dogs Can Improve Student Grades
Boulder, CO— The presence of dogs on campus doesn’t just increase overall well-being and the number of smiles per day; they may also increase test scores, but not in the way that you might think.
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GSU’s Chick-Fil-A Moves to an Even Smaller Location Inside of a Library North Study Room
Georgia State University’s beloved on-campus Chick-Fil-A recently relocated to the Petit Science Center. Students were outraged, as the new location is less convenient and its cramped interior forces many to wait outside for their orders– rain or shine.
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“Neon Day” Participant Visible From Space, NASA Issues Statement
NASA was forced to issue an emergency statement Wednesday after detecting what senior scientists had described as “oh no, what the hell is that” glowing from Western Michigan around Grand Rapids.
“Neon Day” Participant Visible From Space, NASA Issues Statement Read More »
Vending Machine Thief Turns out to Be Three Raccoons in a Trench Coat
After an extensive investigation into stolen vending machines across campus, authorities have finally identified the perpetrator.
Vending Machine Thief Turns out to Be Three Raccoons in a Trench Coat Read More »
