Boulder, CO— Ashley Clark, a student barista at the University of Colorado Boulder faced a unique challenge earlier today. Her shift started like any other, lattes, cold brews, the occasional hot chocolate. Then in walked Michael McMillan.
Barista Cuts Off Student After 5th Order of Quad Espresso Read More »
She has been seen giving students instruments and sports equipment and telling them that she “sacrificed everything for them, so they can’t fail!!”.
Residential staff labeled the incident “a breach of academic culture,” noting that J’s eight full hours of rest posed “a violation of the complete Fulton School’s experience.” Students on the floor gathered in the hallway chanting obscenities as RAs escorted J out of the building for what they described as “malicious resting.”
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Recent KSU alum Hunter Williams found himself unsatisfied with his internship under the Barstool Sports media empire. Majoring in Sports and Entertainment Marketing, he hoped to be able to push the sports podcasts of men who watch highlights of one sport and gain connections in the industry. After an interview that focused on beer chugging technique and if he was “not a beta,” he finds his hours are usually spent scrolling on TikTok and finding videos to “repost” on the Barstool.
Barstool Intern Finds out Job Is Just Scrolling TikTok for 80 Hours a Week Read More »
BOULDER, CO (TN)— On Monday, November 3rd, Evan Shrinner was preparing for his honors defense when he inadvertently collapsed the CU Boulder’s IT department. Shrinner volunteers at the CU Rapid Alert system and is an honors student at the university. In a panic, Shrinner opened his browser and hastily typed “Do they check your browser
Witnesses say the professor froze mid-equation, muttered something about “the laws of thermodynamics not applying to clowns,” and then detonated emotionally, screaming that if he heard those numbers again, he’d “personally turn the building into plasma.”
ASU Professor Blows up After Freshman Won’t Stop Yelling 6 7 in ISTB. Read More »
Then a howl came forth from the ground, and the earth quaked as hundreds of Ranger Bears burst out of the soil.
Ghost Tour of Campus Leads Visitors to Ranger Bear Cemetery Read More »
A routine hike up Chautauqua Trail ended in disaster Tuesday when CU freshman Christopher McMillan returned to his dorm reeking strongly of, “a patchouli-infused stench.” The Boulder Fire Department immediately deployed its Hazmat Response Team, suspecting a nearby drug lab–to find McMillian doing a Hot Yoga session in his room.
Fire Marshall Hoses Down Hippie to Prevent Second Hand Highs Read More »
Chaos erupted on the ASU campus Monday evening following news of a missing student over allegations of fraternizing with a University of Arizona student.
BOULDER, Colo. (TN) – Look, guys—welcome to college, where your love life is basically a minefield that’s going to take some finesse to navigate. Chasing someone a little older? Don’t sweat it. At The Nut, we have your back. Here are ten telltale signs she’s about to have you scrambling for your pants while you swan-dive out the bedroom window.
Sigma Phi Epsilon’s 10 Ways to Tell if She’s Married Read More »
